If you have read any number of my blogs, then you have seen two common themes. First, that is evident is that I have multiple sclerosis. I continually try to let my readers view life from a MSers point of view. I put forth a concerted effort to make my blog informative and honest while allowing the reader to see the humor in life. I like them to be able to understand and maybe even to experience life through my eyes and laughter through the fear.
The second topic is the importance of friends for anyone in life. My blog called “My Untold MS Story” tells how my depression and lack of friends nearly ended my existence. I went through ten years of my life without friendships and can look back to see just how negative that truly was. I experienced the unfavorable impact that a lack of friendships has on an individual. Not having friends forced me to get dangerously close to the edge and almost to see the final curtain call. HOWEVER, that is in my past and never to be faced again.
Let us now steer this bus to the sunnier side of the street. A question was recently posed to me: how do I deal with toxic individuals. It is harder to find a definitive definition of toxic people then nailing fog to the wall. There are a plethora of interpretations through examples then there are actual dictionary explanations. Six early warning signs will alert you that you are dealing with a toxic person or ten behaviors toxic people display but no detailed dictionary definition.
Let me give you seven examples of toxic people so that you can keep an eye out and hopefully save yourself lots of trouble.
First, there is the Conversational Narcissist. It is all about them.
Next is the straight jacket who is someone who wants to control everything and everyone around them.
The third is an emotional moocher also is known as a spiritual vampire because they tend to suck the positivity out of you.
Next is a Drama Magnet who is one that loves drama.
A fifth is the jealous-judgmental person they are incredibly toxic because they have so much self-hate that they cannot be happy for anyone around them.
There is also the fibber as in liars, fibbers, exaggerators… it’s exhausting to have a toxic deceiver in your life
Next is the human tank who is always right and does not take anyone else’s feelings or ideas into account.
MS is mostly a hidden medical condition because bystanders cannot see many of the symptoms. Symptoms such as tiredness, weakness, and depression are most common, yet they are not visible. These symptoms can also change from minute to minute leading to more doubt, distrust, and disbelief.
I am blessed for lack of a better term because my MS signs are apparent. This conspicuous wheelchair of mine does not allow people to call me dishonest. So the question remains “how do I deal with toxic friends in my life?” Simply said these individuals are not friends and do not last long in my world. I do not have the time or energy nor do I have the desire to forge a relationship with a perniciously poisonous person.
Not only friends can be toxic but family members as well. I cannot imagine a family that is not trusting of another family member, but some stories that I have heard are unfathomable.
One story tells how a mom who meets another person with MS later says to their child who also has MS “why can’t you be more like them.” MS is not a one size fits all condition. Shame on that mother for criticizing how multiple sclerosis controls her child.
I know of children who refuse to see or understand how debilitating their father’s multiple sclerosis truly is. You should care about your parent and take a few minutes to learn even a little about what he or she is going through or what may be to come.
We probably all know someone that is potentially toxic. These individuals tend to bring you down and affect your health and well-being. Do your best to distance yourselves from those who are toxic. Spend time with those who might be toxic less and less being in their presence as little as possible. When possible, surround yourself with positive, supportive people and who care about you. People who are full of sunshine and happiness can make any day brighter. They remind you that you are not fighting this medical condition alone and that your quiver of great friends is full.
Toxic people will pollute everything. Do not hesitate. FUMIGATE.